Do you Communicate or Escalate? Conscious Communication skills for Effective Leadership

Communicating our needs consciously and directly is a Self-Leadership skill required in all areas of our lives.

'Stress' is not a power word as has been popularized these days.

To be overwhelmed, busy or stressed is a sign that you are unable to step into your Leadership role effectively and are in need of support.

We lead by example: Asking for our needs to be met is a powerful and exquisite demonstration to others that they too must ask for what they need in a timely fashion, for them and us to be Successful.

Before we go on, a little context to the importance of cultivating Conscious Loving Communication or Safe Communication at home.

For all my years growing up I was not allowed to speak up for my needs at home nor openly express the challenging psychological and emotional experiences I was incurring from the complex family dynamics with my parents and otherwise. My experience was that the grown-ups felt uncomfortable and seemingly threatened every time I broached these sensitive, highly vulnerable topics even as a teen and a young adult.

When we avoid or deny Direct, Healthy Communication from taking place because of our personal insecurities and shadow patterns, our fear of abandonment, humiliation and rejection, we not only Insult the Intelligence of our young ones who are most often born empathic, we also jeopardize the building blocks of Loving Healthy Relationships that are Mutual Respect, Trust and Reliability.

"Are you able to Communicate matters or have you been Escalating them as your way of communicating instead?"

To understand the subtle yet obvious difference is the key to Leadership through Communication.

I have often noticed how most of us especially in our current societal work culture, have learnt to ‘escalate’ matters instead of conducting a clear, honest, direct, 2-way communication or Dialogue with one another.

When we make ourselves available to another's feedback of our communication, it truly opens a gateway for mutual co-operation, support, respect, harmony, clear agreements and it increases the incidence of others keeping their agreements with us.

When we are unable to facilitate a two-way communication and instead we escalate matters, you'll notice, we are constantly “putting out fires” or being called to “defuse” tension in situations either in the workplace and/or at home when agreements have not been made and kept and when there is a lack of deeper understanding of the parties concerned.

Unfortunately 'stress' has become the acceptable "Power Word" we as a culture have adopted to justify and hence defend our overwhelm from not being able to communicate consciously with ourselves & others.